Archive for May, 2010

Don Cherry: Phantom of the Rink

In which Don Cherry, in his pre-game segment before Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Finals, wears a hat and mask, “plays” the organ and “conducts” his own opera. Or something.

But music, or good goaltending, soothes the soul of this poor, tormented creature. Or something.

Seriously, this guy’s WTF level just keeps going up and up and up, and we haven’t even done Coach’s Corner yet tonight.

Don Cherry is trying to make you blind

Seriously. There’s no other explanation. Here’s his amazing jacket from the first game of the 2010 Stanley Cup Finals on the ice in Chicago.

I just…yeah. Wow.

Also, since you can’t see his tie in the on-ice shot, check it out during Coach’s Corner:

Yes, that is some sort of strawberry/chocolate sundae thing?! With a cherry on top?!!?!!1!11!?!one

By all that is holy.

In which I actually agree with Don Cherry

Tonight’s Coach’s Corner saw Don Cherry sporting the same jacket he wore not one week ago, but with a different shirt and tie (bumblebee themed? another springtime reference? hmm…). But this week it’s Ron’s jacket that I’m not really sure what to make of. The colour doesn’t really match either the Hockey Night in Canada set or Don’s shirt, and his narrow tie just makes the whole thing look strange to my eyes.

Also, during the segment, Grapes had a few words of advice for the San Jose Sharks, who were swept out of the playoffs by the Chicago Blackhawks yesterday. He told them to ditch the teal sweaters and praised their black uniforms (“BlackArmor” as they’re officially called; silly name). For once, I agree with him. Teal hockey sweaters? Seriously? I mean, it’s been that way since the team was formed in 1991, and ever since then I’ve thought it was a silly fashion choice.

Of course, this is Don Cherry giving other people advice on how to dress. (We’ve seen this before, remember?) Glass houses, Grapes.

(On the other hand, this is not nearly the worst hockey jersey ever designed—that dubious honour belongs to the infamous St. Louis Blues third jersey, which, fortunately, never actually saw the light of day:

…and I have nothing more to say.)

Nice and refreshing

After a few straight segments of jackets tending toward the wild side (wild even for Don Cherry), today’s matinée Coach’s Corner featured a nice, refreshing, Don Cherry in a—gasp!—tasteful grey pinstripe suit, and a tie that actually goes with the jacket. (Though I’m so used to Don’s double- and triple-breasted suits that seeing him in a single-breasted jacket like this doesn’t quite look right, somehow.) Check it out.

This put me in mind of the classic picture of Don Cherry on the bench coaching, which runs before every Coach’s Corner segment, and which they helpfully put up at the end of today’s segment so Grapes could toot his own horn (what he said was that Joel Quenneville, coach of the Chicago Blackhawks, was not only a snappy dresser, but a good coach because he played under Cherry):

More flowers! More flowers!

Yes, we’ve seen this particular flower jacket before. Yes, Grapes has a propensity to wear pretty flowery fabrics, especially in springtime. So what? And who cares that the fabric is too ugly even to make living room drapes out of? You have to be kidding!

(Bonus pre-game on-ice picture!)

“Faster, men! We’re running out of flowers here, dammit!”

Black stripes all around

It’s a rare day that Don and Ron coordinate their outfits—probably a good thing, since when they’ve tried in the past, the result has often been disastrous—but tonight on Coach’s Corner, both men were sporting black jackets with shiny black stripes. If I knew more about fashion, I’m sure I’d know the word for that kind of striping—wider than pinstripes, but narrower than, oh, vertical blinds—but since I know next to nothing about the sartorial sciences, aside from the fact that Don Cherry dresses like a fool, I’ll just post this picture for you to enjoy and not get tied up in nomenclature. (Also, is it just me, or does Don’s pocket handkerchief not look as expertly tailored as usual tonight?)

Plaid for PEI

Today, to kick off the Eastern Conference final series between the Habs and the Flyers, Don Cherry wore a teal-red plaid (tartan, checked, whatever) jacket for PEI, and for PEI native Brad Richards, whom Grapes called Ron MacLean’s “boyfriend”. Uh huh, Don. Anyway, let’s get to the clothes:

Purple Grapes is purple

Sorry we’ve been gone all the playoffs so far. But we’re back! And just in time, too, because we sure wouldn’t have wanted to miss tonight’s outfit from Don Cherry on Coach’s Corner during the Habs-Pens Game 7. Let’s get back into this with a bang, shall we?

Yes, this hybrid Edwardian smoking jacket/hockey commentator outfit has purple trim on the outside. Not really visible from the frontal shot, but fortunately, the HNIC crew gave us a glimpse of Don’s collar just before the segment started. (This was accompanied by Grapes singing, which in the medium of blogging with still images I mercifully cannot reproduce for you. Count yourselves lucky.) For once, those high Edwardian collars on the shirts Don traditionally wears actually look to serve some sartorial purpose: they don’t actually look too bad with the high collar of this jacket, though I’m still not sure about the overall effect.

Ah, good to be back. Happy playoffs, everyone! Hope your favourite team[s] [are doing well|did all right|will do better next year]!


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